{"product_id":"t-shirt-proud-father-of-few-dumbass-kids-patriotic-graphic-tee","title":"T-Shirt — \"Proud Father of Few Dumbass Kids\" Patriotic Graphic Tee","description":"\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width:360px;\"\u003e\n            \u003cthead\u003e\n                \u003ctr\u003e\n                    \u003cth style=\"padding:10px;\"\u003e\u003c\/th\u003e\n                    \u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eM\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eXL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e3XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e4XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e5XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n                \u003c\/tr\u003e\n            \u003c\/thead\u003e\n            \u003ctbody\u003e\n                \n                    \u003ctr\u003e\n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            Width, in\n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            18.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            20.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            22.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            24.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            26.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            28.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            30.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            32.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                    \u003c\/tr\u003e\n               \n                    \u003ctr\u003e\n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            Length, in\n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            28.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            29.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            30.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            31.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            32.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            33.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            34.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            35.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                    \u003c\/tr\u003e\n               \n                    \u003ctr\u003e\n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            Sleeve length (from center back), in\n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            15.10 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            16.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            18.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            19.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            21.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            22.40 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            23.70 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            25.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                    \u003c\/tr\u003e\n               \n                    \u003ctr\u003e\n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            Size tolerance, in\n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                    \u003c\/tr\u003e\n               \n            \u003c\/tbody\u003e\n        \u003c\/table\u003e\n        This classic tee carries a bold, irreverent message with vintage Americana styling — block letters filled with stars and stripes and a distressed finish that feels lived-in from the first wear. The medium-weight cotton drapes comfortably, and the crew neck and classic fit make it an easy go-to for backyard barbecues, road trips, or low-key weekends. It’s the kind of shirt you pull on when you want to make people laugh, start conversations, or lean into a louder, sarcastic sense of humor without fuss. The muted vintage print pairs well with worn denim, cargo shorts, or a flannel tied around the waist, so it becomes an effortless part of your off-duty rotation.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% cotton (solid colors) — medium 5.3 oz\/yd² (180 g\/m²) for year-round comfort\u003cbr\u003e- Tubular knit, no side seams — cleaner look and reduced fabric waste\u003cbr\u003e- Ribbed knit collar with shoulder tape — holds shape and prevents stretching\u003cbr\u003e- Dual printing: DTF for sleeves\/inner neck, DTG for main art — crisp, detailed print\u003cbr\u003e- OEKO-TEX® STANDARD 100 certified; tear-away label; EU 2-year warranty\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Non-chlorine: bleach as needed\u003cbr\u003e- Do not iron\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\u003cbr\u003e- Tumble dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Gildan 5000, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWarnings, Hazard\u003c\/strong\u003e: For adults, Made in Nicaragua\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not iron, Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Charcoal \/ S","offer_id":58142113169711,"sku":"57960619521379023078","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ S","offer_id":58142113202479,"sku":"33783801325641991706","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ S","offer_id":58142113235247,"sku":"32825579503852626678","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":58142113268015,"sku":"24921585184051558084","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ S","offer_id":58142113300783,"sku":"67713582392420487955","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ S","offer_id":58142113333551,"sku":"23980163183272938085","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ M","offer_id":58142113366319,"sku":"20744590503263504502","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ M","offer_id":58142113399087,"sku":"28074564789216693444","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ M","offer_id":58142113431855,"sku":"23433119316963592513","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":58142113464623,"sku":"16262808607277296750","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ M","offer_id":58142113497391,"sku":"20635479398051061374","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ M","offer_id":58142113530159,"sku":"22851345385470784756","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ L","offer_id":58142113562927,"sku":"61927141343472251582","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ L","offer_id":58142113595695,"sku":"19665875593407110734","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ L","offer_id":58142113628463,"sku":"23900613056086230620","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":58142113661231,"sku":"23185187214407025915","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ L","offer_id":58142113693999,"sku":"33453956768578574066","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ L","offer_id":58142113726767,"sku":"94782919788895768149","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ XL","offer_id":58142113759535,"sku":"28636434124144567826","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ XL","offer_id":58142113792303,"sku":"54496687372551836404","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ XL","offer_id":58142113825071,"sku":"31191407531734940755","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":58142113857839,"sku":"31880525891135386337","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ XL","offer_id":58142113890607,"sku":"16976202598156299898","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ XL","offer_id":58142113923375,"sku":"13358909667228130020","price":15.83,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ 2XL","offer_id":58142113956143,"sku":"28805976597145538200","price":19.08,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ 2XL","offer_id":58142113988911,"sku":"14916575030265882562","price":19.08,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 2XL","offer_id":58142114021679,"sku":"32373312726915543374","price":19.08,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":58142114054447,"sku":"30760890051531612075","price":19.08,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ 2XL","offer_id":58142114087215,"sku":"97289715450728403611","price":19.08,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 2XL","offer_id":58142114119983,"sku":"77469837522248800727","price":19.08,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ 3XL","offer_id":58142114152751,"sku":"92167514384511559129","price":20.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ 3XL","offer_id":58142114185519,"sku":"32932794473687304288","price":20.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 3XL","offer_id":58142114218287,"sku":"22453815668726226318","price":20.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":58142114251055,"sku":"23511126241520059663","price":20.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ 3XL","offer_id":58142114283823,"sku":"36969707920532147112","price":20.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 3XL","offer_id":58142114316591,"sku":"94735264107595009291","price":20.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 4XL","offer_id":58142114349359,"sku":"33649283574918391017","price":21.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":58142114382127,"sku":"23759546124740337356","price":21.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 5XL","offer_id":58142114414895,"sku":"31877646571009338508","price":21.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":58142114447663,"sku":"70126261654362306772","price":21.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0785\/1570\/0015\/files\/8043460554915560608_2048.jpg?v=1783283618","url":"https:\/\/theinappropriatecrafter.com\/products\/t-shirt-proud-father-of-few-dumbass-kids-patriotic-graphic-tee","provider":"The Inappropriate Crafter ","version":"1.0","type":"link"}